Forgiveness is not Logical

We get stuck with forgiving when looking for logical reasons to forgive. We often say, “I can't forgive” or “I don't know how to forgive” because we are looking for a good reason to forgive. The problem is that we may never find a good reason. Forgiveness challenges us to be compassionate, to offer kindness to someone who seemingly doesn't deserve it. We may think, “Why should I be nice to the person who has hurt me?” This is the logical mind at work and this logical mind isn't going to … [Read more...]

Dealing with Anger

Dealing with Anger By Arcana Siddhi The Core of Anger In 1976 I had my first boil. Beneath my skin emerged a red swollen protrusion about an inch in diameter. The inflamed mound soon had a snowcap as the infection made its way to the top. Eventually it erupted through the skin and the infection came gushing out relieving me of the pain. For the next few days the discharge continued to drain out and the boil receded. I was glad to have it over with until a friend of mine asked me “did you get … [Read more...]

The Compassion Exercise

The Compassion Exercise Instructions: Pick a person who has hurt you and run the following five steps on them.. Step 1 With attention on the person, repeat to yourself: “Just like me, this person is seeking some happiness for his/her life.” Step 2 With attention on the person, repeat to yourself: “Just like me, this person is trying to avoid suffering in his/her life.” Step 3 With attention on the person, repeat to yourself: “Just like me, this person has known sadness, loneliness, … [Read more...]

Radharani and Forgiveness

Lord Indra was worried Maharaja Prthu might steal away some of his power and prestige, so  he stole one of the horses for the sacrifice that Prthu was doing,and when he realized he had done wrong, he took shelter of Lord Visnu who then told Prthu to forgive Indra, which he did. So even the Lord wants us to be forgiving to an errant devotee. It is actually the will of the Lord that we be forgiving , so if I  claim to love the Lord, I must be forgiving so that He may be pleased with me, … [Read more...]

More Quotes On Forgiveness

Forgiving releases you from the punishment of a self-made prison where you are both the inmate and the jailer. (Sidney and Suzanne Simon) Release them and you will be released. (Josif Tson) The hatred you're carrying is a live coal in your heart - far more damaging to yourself than to them.   (Lawana Blackwell) Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die. (Nelson Mandela) When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by … [Read more...]

Srila Prabhupada Quotes on Forgiveness

Forgiveness is Pleasing to Krsna The duty of a brahmana is to culture the quality of forgiveness, which is illuminating like the sun. The Supreme Personality of Godhead, Hari, is pleased with those who are forgiving. (SB 9.15.40) The Lord is very satisfied with His devotee when the devotee greets other people with tolerance, mercy, friendship and equality. (SB 4.11.13) Forgiveness is Dharma Forgiveness is virtue, forgiveness is sacrifice and forgiveness is the Vedas. Forgiveness is … [Read more...]

Paradoxical Commandments

Paradoxical Commandments By Kent Keith People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build anyway If you find serenity and … [Read more...]

How to know you have totally forgiven

Have You Forgiven? Below is a checklist to help you determine whether or not you are practicing a life of forgiveness, and thus what you may still need to work on. Go over this checklist as many times as needed for any person you have issues with. On a scale of 0 to 10, with 10 being the highest level of unforgiveness, rate your forgiveness practice (0 is a perfect practice). You need your offender to apologize. You need your offender to admit they were wrong. You need your … [Read more...]

Forgiveness Studies

In his book, "The Forgiving Self," clinical psychologist Robert Karen describes case histories of patients whose lives have benefited by forgiving, and offers practical advice on how to bring yourself to forgive. Similar insights come from another clinical psychologist, Everett Worthington, Jr., author of "Five Steps to Forgiveness: The Art and Science of Forgiving." Worthington, who is a professor at Virginia Commonwealth University and a pioneer in forgiveness research, has found that … [Read more...]

Forgiveness Affirmations

Forgiveness Affirmations I openly recognize and accept my I am grateful for this situation. I embrace the difficulties I need for my growth and purification. I positively respond to the events in my life. I accept that no one can hurt me unless I allow them to. I connect with my compassionate side as I empathize with my “offender.” I am aligned with my beliefs. I willingly let go of the records of how I was wronged. I choose to forgive. I feel happy and peaceful … [Read more...]

Brahmanas and Forgiving

“O great hero,” he said, “you have unnecessarily killed the king, who is supposed to be the embodiment of all the demigods. Thus you have committed a sin. We brahmanas are worshipable by others only due to our quality of forgiveness. It is through this quality of forgiveness that Lord Brahma has achieved the post of master of the entire universe. The Supreme Personality of Godhead Lord Hari, the remover of obstacles, becomes pleased with those who are forgiving. Forgiveness is illuminating like … [Read more...]

Beliefs About Forgiveness

Beliefs About Forgiveness On a scale of 0 to 10, 0 indicating you totally disagree and 10 indicating you totally agree, please rate the following statements. What was done was so hurtful and destructive that it is unforgiveable. What was done was so hurtful and destructive that it’s wrong to forgive. Only minor offences should be forgiven. It is only possible to forgive after an offender apologizes. My offender must admit they were wrong before I can forgive. It is only possible to … [Read more...]

Forgiveness Means A Soft Heart

Love is a much more pleasant emotion than hate. If we get a taste for love, we will give up our taste for hate. If we allow ourselves to appreciate someone we hate, it will transform our life. Forgiveness takes place when there is a change in our heart. If we only understand forgiveness in our mind, our heart won’t change. Forgiveness comes when we are willing to open our heart enough to feel the pain and hurt life presents to our abuser. When we do this, hostility begins to melt … [Read more...]

Forgiveness is the Cure for Victimhood

Forgiveness is one of the greatest cures for victimhood. Unfortunately, not being a victim is uncomfortable for some people. It's easy to see why a person who wants to remain a victim can't forgive others- then they would have to give up their victimhood. We should be glad the abuse is over. Are we really glad? No, we’re not. We relive the event over and over again and we often relive it with more intensity and suffering than when it originally occurred. Giving up resentment is like any … [Read more...]

Responsibility

Is Forgiveness Possible Before We Are Pure? The Golden Avatara in this age of Kali, Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, asked us to do kirtana (chant the holy names of God) in a humble state of mind with the tolerance and forgiveness of a tree. This instruction was not meant for the realized souls for they were already humble, tolerant, and forgiving. This instruction was for those who wanted to become realized souls. If we think forgiveness is not possible unless we are a saint, it's worth … [Read more...]

You Create Your Own Hell

You create your own hell, and then you burn in it. My spiritual master sometimes uses the expression "hellish mentality. Yet, he doesn’t differentiate a “hellish mentality” from “dwelling in hell.” We are impacted by every one of our thoughts. If the thoughts are hellish, we are in hell. Hell is the absence of God. So a hellish mind is a mind without thoughts of God. How far is God from us? He is only one thought away. How far is hell from us. It's also only one thought away. … [Read more...]

Forgiveness Challenges You

We get stuck with forgiving when looking for logical reasons to forgive. We often say “I can’t forgive” or “I don’t know how to forgive” because we are looking for a good reason to forgive. The problem is you may never find a “good” reason. Forgiveness challenges us to be compassionate, to offer kindness to someone who seemingly doesn’t deserve it. We may think, “Why should I be nice to the person who has hurt me?” This is the logical mind at work, and this logical mind isn’t going to … [Read more...]

Compassion Cures Resentment

A devotee of the Lord does not want to see another person suffer. He feels he has no right to judge or inflict pain on anyone. When this humility mixes with compassion, feeling for the suffering of others, forgiveness arises. In the tradition of bhakti (devotion), humility, forgiveness and compassion are inherent within bhakti. This means that wherever bhakti fully mamifests there must be humility, forgiveness and compassion. When we look for justification for our resentment, it is helpful … [Read more...]

Hard Hearted

To advance in spritiual life the heart must become soft. Fault finding, holding grudges, being jealous of others, etc. makes the heart hard. In the Vedas it is said that a person advanced in spiritual consciousness has a heart soft like gold and such a soft heart can easily melt in love of God. … [Read more...]

Your Story

A baby lion was raised by a family of sheep. When he grew older they sent him away because he was different. A man found him lamenting because he was faced with a life alone. The man asked why are you so depressed and the lion told him of his plight. The man said you are not a sheep, you are a lion. When the lion finally realized who he was, he became happy. As long as he thought he was a weird kind of sheep, he remained unhappy. So he had the wrong story about who he was. Similarly, many of … [Read more...]